


Light A Fire

by Reijin_Hakumei



Category: Bleach
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Play, Anal Sex, Angst with a Happy Ending, Complete, Explicit Sexual Content, First Kiss, First Time, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Overstimulation, Sexual Tension
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-21
Updated: 2020-04-21
Packaged: 2021-02-23 09:13:56
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,243
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23775895
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Reijin_Hakumei/pseuds/Reijin_Hakumei
Summary: Renji has returned to Hanging Dog for a mission with Byakuya at his side.  Unsure of his captain's intentions for inviting himself along, Renji tries to focus on what's in front of him.  Unfortunately, his captain seems determined to drag his mind back to the past.Excerpt:Rain.  It’s a heavy torrent as they make their way through the market district of Hanging Dog. Tall three story buildings with green roofs pressing in on them, souls shouting their wears to the few still walking the rough street.  His familiarity with the district was why he was sent after reports of hollow activity in the area. His captain’s presence, slightly behind and stoically following, seemingly dismissive and uncaring of the abhorrent weather, he could not truthfully explain.  Not that he could ever truthfully explain anything that goes on in his captain’s head.
Relationships: Abarai Renji/Kuchiki Byakuya
Comments: 13
Kudos: 107





	Light A Fire

**Author's Note:**

  * For [SesshomaruFreak](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SesshomaruFreak/gifts).



Author’s note: This is going to be short cause I know most don’t read these. 

    1. I don’t own Bleach. Phew, I’m glad I got that off my chest.
    2. This fic is for SesshomaruFreak :)


  * _Italics are excerpts from cannon material_



*****Light A Fire*****

_Light a fire to the fang_

_That cannot be reached_

_So I do not see the star_

_So that I do not slit this throat_

* * *

Rain. It’s a heavy torrent as they make their way through the market district of Hanging Dog. Tall three story buildings with green roofs pressing in on them, souls shouting their wears to the few still walking the rough street. His familiarity with the district was why he was sent after reports of hollow activity in the area. His captain’s presence, slightly behind and stoically following, seemingly dismissive and uncaring of the abhorrent weather, he could not truthfully explain. Not that he could ever truthfully explain anything that goes on in his captain’s head.

~Flashback~

“Lieutenant Abarai. You are to report to Hanging Dog and investigate possible hollow activity. Gather a team and leave immediately and remedy the situation,” the black butterfly spoke with the Head Captain’s voice. 

Watching it flutter away, Renji then turned to his captain with a bow to dismiss himself from their meeting. “Forgive me Kuchiki-taichou. I need to gather a team at once.”

“That will not be necessary Renji. I will accompany you.”

~Present~

It was not lost on him that the last mission they had been on together, just the two of them, was to retrieve Rukia. So much had happened since then. Renji thought he perhaps understood Byakuya a bit better and felt more comfortable in his presence at least. But in many ways Byakuya remained that unattainable star, forever out of reach. Thoughts returned to him, unbidding and unwelcome, the ever heavy reiatsu behind his back a constant reminder of his captain’s presence.

_‘I have always been afraid. Always been pretending to follow you closely, always been pretending to sharpen my teeth, when the truth is, I am… scared to death just treading on your shadow.’_

Now, he was leading and it was Byakuya that followed in his shadow. Hanging Dog was the same, seemingly untouched by the fifty odd years since he lived here with Rukia, the adopted sister of his current captain. That’s when he had first seen Byakuya, when the Kuchiki clan were discussing the adoption with Rukia.

His presence had been so overwhelming back then. He hadn’t even been able to look him in the eyes.

Renji was stronger now. He was a respected lieutenant and had achieved his own bankai.

Now, when he looked at Byakuya, he could look him in the eyes. He was closer than ever.

And yet, the star remained out of reach.

At first Byakuya had been his reason for growing stronger, his reason to better himself. A person to surpass, a goal to overcome.

He had been so naive back then.

Byakuya was so much more than the pedestal Renji had once placed him on. He was deeply conflicted between his duty as a captain, as head of the Kuchiki clan, as a brother, and as a friend. He abhorred breaking rules but Renji knew he would for the sake of someone he loved.

He had left Kurosaki alive after all. Renji wondered just how disappointed Byakuya really was to be defeated at Sokyoku Hill. He wondered how much of that disappointment was actually relief.

None in Hanging Dog seemed to have any useful information for their mission and the town was currently quiet of spiritual energy. Rejin and his captain’s reiatsu the only two beacons in an otherwise calm landscape. Night was falling now and, thinking idly about getting out of the rain and settling somewhere for the night, his feet carried him thoughtlessly to the shack he once called home.

When he noticed where they had arrived, the sound of the river rushing past slightly louder than the rain, he blinked at the unassuming building in front of him. Sheepishly, he turned to his captain and said, “Sorry Kuchiki-taichou. I didn’t mean to bring you here. We can go back to the market district, there are inns there that would be better to spend the night at.”

“Where is ‘here’, exactly, Renji?” came the calm reply. Renji found it odd that he didn’t have to strain to hear his captain’s voice over the rain. Power seemed to come to him effortlessly. Renji felt like he could have been on the other side of the river and still would have heard him perfectly.

Renji faced him fully, a hand going to scratch the back of his neck a bit as he fumbled slightly for an answer. “Home, I guess. Or, it used to be. Rukia and I lived here once back when we were kids. I guess my feet decided to bring me back. I didn’t really intend on us coming here. It’s abandoned now.”

“Hm.” Byakuya seemed to consider the building in front of them for a moment. “Well, we are here now, intention or not. Will you invite me in?”

Renji blinked and then sputtered, “Really, we should go back to the market district! There’s nothing left here but a bunch of old memories and some broken furniture. It’s likely leaking inside and the floor’s probably wet. We should really just -”

“Renji. Invite me in.”

Byakuya had that look in his eyes and Renji knew to back down. With a sigh he approached the building. He was amazed it was still standing, honestly. He opened the door, letting the sparse light of twilight softly illuminate the room. The floor was, miraculously, dry, and he couldn’t see any immediate problems with the roof. 

He moved to the side and turned again to Byakuya and said, “Welcome in, Kuchiki-taicho. There’s not much but at least it’s dry.”

Byakuya crossed over the threshold then stood off to the side, watching Renji as he found the old barrel they used to light a fire in for warmth and light. There was still some wood stacked up in the corner so he threw it in and used kido to light it. With the fire now illuminating the room, he closed the door, shutting out the storm though it did little to dampen the sound of the rain as it thundered down on the roof.

“So this is where you and Rukia grew up.”

Renji started slightly at the question but then replied with some warmth, “Yeah. We spent ten years here together with some other kids. We were each other’s family. We all looked after one another. Rukia thought we would always be here.”

“Hm. We should probably allow our uniforms to dry. Do you have any other clothing here?”

“I told you we should have just gone to an inn. Maybe I can dig up some Yukatas, give me a second.” Renji went to his old dresser. He had grown slightly since he had left but it wasn’t by much and Byakuya was a bit shorter than him anyway. 

“Here,” Renji said, handing over a yukata, “the material's pretty thin but I’ve got blankets around here somewhere. Don’t expect the quality you’re used to.”

“This will do adequately, thank you Renji.” Byakuya began to remove his haori and Renji turned around to give him some privacy, lost in his own thoughts as his captain changed behind him. Was this why he had wanted to accompany Renji on this mission? To see where Rukia had grown up? Rukia would have taken him here, if he had asked her, Renji was certain. There wasn’t anything that Rukia wouldn’t do for her brother. And Renji knew that that was how she saw him, even if she had been adopted. Rukia loved her brother and Renji knew that Byakuya cared for her too. It felt odd to him, being the one here. Rukia should be showing him this, not him. 

The sound of metal on wood brought him out of his thoughts and Renji glanced over at Byakuya again. He was dressed in the yukata Renji had handed him, removing the kenseikan from his hair and running his fingers through, loosening any knots with care and patience. Renji staired for a moment, a bit dazed as he watched those long fingers gently work, his mind somewhere in between wondering how those fingers would feel in his own long hair and how Byakuya’s hair would feel if his hands were replaced with Renji’s. 

“Are you not going to change as well?”

Renji blinked out of his reverie, chastising himself mentally for his thoughts. “Yeah, I’ve got another one here,” he replied, holding up another yukata. With his back to Byakuya he slipped out of his uniform and into the yukata, his mind elsewhere.

Thoughts like that seemed to come more and more often now. Renji couldn’t say when it had started. After their battle, certainly. He had once feared Byakuya, his strength and power. Somehow though, through working under him and seeing him constantly, his feelings had begun to change. He no longer outright feared his captain, though he still took care not to cross him or offend him. But he was surprised at what had taken its place. 

Perhaps it was watching him interact with Rukia, a person Renji also considered close family and a sister of sorts. Byakuya could clearly care for another, deeply. Perhaps it was witnessing how he led squad 6, always firm yet fair, demanding yet considerate. Perhaps it was in the way he conducted his family affairs, always available for the concerns of his cousins and willing to offer advice. Even his interactions with Kurosaki were telling to the captain’s character. The brash substitute should have been an irritant to the always propper head of the Kuchiki clan, but instead he teased back, in his own way, goading him on. Like friends do. 

Somewhere in all of that, Renji had fallen hard for his captain. But he had quickly resigned himself to a fate of unrequited affection. After all, Byakuya had once been married and Renji knew that he loved his late wife.

Their conversation during their ill-fated battle returned to him, taunting him. Byakuya’s words like so many knives to his heart, _‘Let me tell you about the difference between you and me. It’s like the story of the monkey trying to capture the moon. However close he thinks he is to the moon… It is still just the reflection of the moon in the middle of the lake. No matter how he struggles to capture that “moon” he inevitably sinks to the bottom of the lake at the end to no avail. Your fangs… will never be able to reach me. Ever.’_

“There seems to be only one usable bed. The rest are either broken or far too small.” Byakuya’s statement pulled Renji out of the past. 

Renji’s traitorous mind had a brief passing fantasy of sharing the bed. He shook his head to clear the preposterous image and replied, “I’ll take the floor, you can have the bed.”

“No. There is no possibility you will rest that way and we are on a mission. This bed is large enough, we can share it.”

“What…” Renji could not have heard his captain correctly. 

“Renji, come here.” Byakuya had sat on the edge of the bed and was looking at him passively. Renji couldn’t read anything from him. His expression, posture, tone of voice, nothing conveyed his captain’s thoughts.

“Are, are you sure, captain? I can take the floor, I used to all the time-”

“Renji, I do not enjoy repeating myself.” Byakuya had that look in his eyes again, the one Renji had learned to back down from because he wouldn’t win.

“Fine,” Renji said softly. “Just, let me find a blanket…” He gathered one quickly from another dresser in the room and shook it out a bit, coughing slightly at the dust produced. He looked over at Byakuya with a frown and said, “you know it’s still not too late to-”

“Renji.”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m coming.” Byakuya stood as Renji came around the other side of the bed and helped him straighten the blanket, proceeding to climb in on that side with his back to the middle of the bed, all the while looking anywhere other than at his handsome captain.

“Should I put the fire out?” Byakuya asked from behind him.

“No, it’ll be fine. It’ll burn itself out in a couple hours anyway. We always went to sleep with it burning and never had a problem. You’d be surprised how cold it gets without it.”

“Hm. Alright.”

Renji felt the other side of the bed dip and the blanket shift slightly. Renji felt betrayed by his heart as it beat faster. There is nothing to be excited about, he told himself furiously. We’re just sleeping next to each other. This doesn’t mean anything.

But he wanted it to. He wanted to turn into Byakuya, to pull him closer, to finally smell that dark hair and bury his face against that long neck, lips gently pressed against soft skin...

_‘Damn… I am really a tramp down to my bones… I bark at the star, but… I don’t have the courage to jump and grab it.’_

“You said Rukia thought you would always be here. So why did you leave?” The question was soft but Renji knew better than to ignore it. It seemed his captain wanted to discuss the past. And maybe reminiscing a bit would distract him and help his heart stop aching.

Renji turned to lay on his back, staring at the exposed beams of the ceiling as the fire flickered shadows about, dancing. He had no idea how to really answer this question. “I suppose…” he started, haltingly, emotions and thoughts long stuffed into the back of his mind all clawing to the surface, “we just didn’t have anything left keeping us here.”

“Explain.”

Sometimes Renji hated how calm Byakuya was, how unaffected. It made the man exceedingly difficult to read. So he gave up trying. He exhaled roughly, allowing Byakuya’s calm to steady him. If he couldn’t decipher his captain’s reasoning, behind accompanying him here today, behind insisting they stay here of all places, behind this conversation, he would stop trying and simply accept the situation as it was. That fit him far better, giving up control of the situation to his captain. He was never one to dwell anyway, instead preferring to move forward. So he’d let go and simply allow Byakuya to lead this. Renji smiled in amusement at the thoughts he had had earlier about leading Byakuya through Hanging Dog. Such a fool. Byakuya always led, and Renji would always follow.

“There used to be many of us, when we were kids. We would use each other for survival. A group was better at stealing food and getting away, better at defending a hideout, but not better at sharing when food became scarce. The older kids tended to take from the younger, weaker ones. Rukia changed that.

“Some of us were stealing food. Even though Mameji had tied the vender to his table, he chased us. We were just kids, and starving, so it didn’t take much for him to catch up to us. Rukia came out of nowhere, sliding into him and knocking him down. Then she led us away, the path she blazed riddled with pathways too small for the shopkeep to follow us. 

“Fujimaru insisted we invite her back to our hideout to share our spoils, since it was mostly because of her that we still had them. It took some convincing but she returned with us. I gave her her share. She had never had rock candy before and I could tell she was interested in trying it. But then one of the older kids made a younger one drop his share causing the boy to cry. Rukia acted so fast. She said we needed to take care to each other, that we needed to be each other's family, otherwise we were no better than the adults that ignored us and left us to suffer on our own.

“Hanging Dog wasn’t good at forming little makeshift families like I know some of the other districts are. Rukia was right, we only had each other. The ones that couldn’t live like that were pushed out over time. Some left on their own, wanting to leave Hanging Dog and try their luck in another district. Eventually it was just me, Rukia, Fujimaru, Kosaburou, and Mameji left. And it was just like Rukia said. We took care of each other, like real brothers and sisters. Rukia kept us together, she was our glue.

“I remember one day we met a shinigami from the academy that had come back to Hanging Dog on a mission. He was originally from here. Rukia almost fainted in the street being in his presence. He told her it was because she had strong reiatsu and thus needed to eat. He gave us some real food that day, not the candy they sell at the stands in the market. Rukia and I both felt a lot stronger after eating it.

“Soon after we began practicing with the reiatsu we now knew we possesed. She was more skilled in controlling it than I was. Fuji, Kosa, and Mame would watch us and tell us we would one day go to the Academy. Rukia would always just laugh it off, saying she’d never leave. That we’d be together as a family forever.”

Renji took a few minutes to collect himself. This story would now get significantly more difficult to tell. Byakuya seemed to sense his unwillingness to go on. Renji felt the bed shift beside him and glanced over to see that Byakuya had shifted on his side, the arm against the bed cradling his head as his silver eyes focused on Renji’s, looking deep into dark brown. His other hand, deceptively delicate for Renji knew the strength it possessed, slowly moved to clasp the shoulder closest to him, his grip both careful yet firm, similar to the smooth voice that simply said, “Continue.”

Renji let out a harsh breath and refocused on the ceiling. The hand remained and he let it ground him.

“We lost Mameji first. He was the smallest of us, even smaller than Rukia. We teased him all the time but he gave as good as he got. He was really good with numbers and that was actually pretty important for some of the shops. Not many people are literate in Hanging Dog, let alone skilled in accounting. Mame realized he could make money by helping with the book keeping in the market district. And the arrangements he had with the shopkeepers there worked well for a while.

“Until a new client of his accused him of stealing and lying about the numbers. We don’t have much of a public authority or justice system around here. Mame was so small and he didn’t have a drop of reiatsu. He didn’t have a chance. We found him in one of the alleyways a couple days after he didn’t come home. We buried him up on a hill overlooking the town, as high as we could. He had liked sitting up there. He said it put things in perspective.”

Renji had his eyes closed tight at this point, breath hitching as he tried to let the unexpected grief wash over him. He felt the solid, grounding weight of the hand on his shoulder squeeze slightly. Breathing out he refocused on the ceiling but his eyes were decidedly moist now as he forced himself onward.

“Kosaburou was next. He had been really close to Mameji and, with Mame gone, he just wasn’t himself. He had gotten work as a laborer, helping with the construction around town. He had always been a hard worker, despite his large size, but he became unfocused. It was an accident, a stupid one. At least one of the other workers came home to tell us what had happened and we didn’t have to find him later in some street. We buried him next to Mame.”

When he blinked there were tears now but somehow Renji didn’t feel sad, exactly. His chest felt both like it was being crushed yet also lighter with every word he managed. The grounding presence of Byakuya’s hand remained as he continued.

“Fujimaru felt responsible. Rukia was a mess. I was trying to keep us afloat with odd jobs around town. We should have watched Fuji more carefully. He was smart but reckless. He had convinced himself that if he had taken better care of Mame, none of this would have happened. Kosa wouldn’t have fallen into depression and they would both still be with us. I think he may have gotten drunk one night, as he was usually good at talking himself down from his more idiotic ideas. We found out later that he had figured out which shopkeep had killed Mame. We found his body in the same alleyway and buried him next to Fuji on the hill.

“After that Rukia and I tried to keep things together. Support each other. We grieved together but after a while she had had enough. She couldn’t look at this town without feeling disgust and despair. She said we should leave and join the academy. Try to build a new life. Try to find happiness. I agreed and we never looked back.”

Renji turned to Byakuya, his eyes once again finding silver. Renji thought there was warmth in his expression but it was still difficult to read. A few tears still fell slowly but he ignored them. He did feel lighter, even though the memories were hard. He was grateful that his captain had asked, had wanted to know, had seemed interested. And sharing the pain somehow made it a little less heavy. “I don’t think I ever properly thanked you, taichou. For what you did for Rukia. She’s happy now and a large part of that was because of you. So, really, thank you.”

Renji smiled, genuinely, through his tears as he lost himself in liquid silver. Then Byakuya moved and Renji gasped as the hand that had been grasping his near shoulder moved to the other side, grabbed him firmly and rolled him into Byakuya’s side as the hand that had been underneath the captain slid underneath Renji to cradle his back. Renji’s head met a firm shoulder as the hand on his back pushed him closer, his tears drying on the fabric of Byakuya’s yukata as his breath ghosted across the exposed chest from where the garment had fallen open from the shift. Byakuya’s now free hand found the one Renji had curled into his chest, unconsciously creating distance between them during the move, and pulled it out to lay beside his face against that firm, bared chest. A long leg came between his even longer ones and a foot hooked on his calph, as if to secure him there. 

Renji had frozen. His mind had blanked and he lay rigid against his captain, held in place by the insistent hand on his back and foot against his leg. He didn’t even try to struggle, he was too shocked. 

Byakuya’s free hand had begun along the arm he had moved to rest atop his chest, long fingers gently petting and causing electricity in their wake. Renji was slowly melting and soon the hand on this back began moving as well, shifting slowly as it was no longer needed to keep him captive.

Renji had never felt so warm, so safe, or so utterly confused. But he had already decided tonight to give up on understanding his captain. Perhaps this was his way of offering comfort though Renji highly doubted this level of… intimacy? Was that what this was? ...would be extended often, if ever. 

Several long minutes passed, Renji melting further into this embrace, lost in the feeling of long fingers running along his bare arm and clothed back. He knew he was growing hard, especially as the touches became more firm, massaging out any tension they could find. He was also fairly certain his captain could feel what effect this was having on him by now but he hadn’t stopped and Renji was far too gone to move. Maybe he was selfish but he was going to enjoy every second of this and he refused to be embarrassed. It was a natural reaction after all, especially given exactly who was touching him, and he trusted Byakuya with his life. It was easy to trust him with this.

Eventually the fingers that had been slowly mapping every inch of his arm came to rest against his chin and Renji felt his head being tilted up. Glazed brown eyes found liquid silver and Renji shivered at the emotion he found there. There was so much want, so much longing, and something else he couldn’t quite place. 

“Renji.” There was a question in Byakuya’s voice but the tone had changed from before. It was lower now and slightly rough with need. Rejin’s breath hitched and his heart accelerated at the clear lust in that usually smooth voice. 

He knew he had to respond, but his brain wasn’t functioning quite clearly. After a few moments he managed to find his voice again, “Kuchi-”

“No.” The command was firm and Renji fell silent immediately, heart skipping a beat and mouth clicking shut. “No Renji. Not when we’re alone like this. Address me by my own name, not by my family’s.” Byakuya’s tone hadn’t changed and Renji closed his eyes, just for a second, allowing a whine to slip past his lips at the correction.

Brown refocused on silver and he was lost. Byakuya seemed to realize he’d need to try again and so he repeated, “Renji.”

Renji swallowed the saliva that had accumulated suddenly in his mouth then shakingly responded, “Byakuya?”

Byakuya’s lips curled into a smile at the address and Renji felt oddly proud. How silly, he thought. Then he focused as that once smooth voice, now dripping with husk, began again.

“Would you permit me to kiss you?”

Rejin’s eyes unfocused at the question, immediately swarmed with thoughts of his own. What? Why would Byakuya ask such a thing? Hadn’t he said… 

_‘Your fangs… will never be able to reach me. Ever.’_

So why? Why was he doing this? Why was he holding him so gently? Why was he stroking him with such care? Why was he looking at him with such need and want and… something?

Why?

_‘I bark at the star, but… I don’t have the courage to jump and grab it.’_

“Renji?”

Brown eyes refocused, burning into melting silver.

To hell with it. He’d find that courage, and he’d find it now.

“Yes.”

Byakuya closed the distance between their mouths instantly at the response. At the touch Renji felt a heat wash over him, rushing down to his now aching length pressed against Byakuya’s thigh. He gasped at the intensity of his body’s reaction - to just the press of those soft lips - and Byakuya immediately deepened the kiss, tilting his head, bringing a deep moan from Renji.

Byakuya was shifting them again, pushing Renji onto his back but keeping his thigh against Renji’s length and creating just enough friction to keep Renji’s mind focused on the waves of pleasure instead of the ridiculousness of his captain’s actions. Renji kissed back, hard, his tongue twisting around the other mapping his mouth, fighting for control of the kiss. Byakuya relented to allow Renji into his mouth, his own quiet moan surfacing as Renji took the chance to thoroughly explore.

Renji’s hands had come to bury themselves into the long, silken black strands as he explored the captain’s mouth. His hips moved against the thigh that pressed down on him and he groaned louder, hands gripping tighter, teeth pulling at those soft lips.

Byakuya pulled away from this kiss, both men panting harshly into the quiet, shadows and light dancing from the fire in the room. Renji felt his hand being removed from that inky black hair and keened at the loss. Byakuya smirked down at him, bringing Renji’s hands to rest above his head and clasping the wrists together with one elegant hand. The motion of his hips had not stopped and Byakuya’s other hand clamped down on his hip, halting the movement. 

Byakuya leaned back, regaining control as he watched Renji pant beneath him and took a moment to take him in. Renji looked wrecked, his vibrant red hair laying disheveled against the pillow below, his brown eyes completely glazed over with lust, his breath coming in harsh pants, his chest heaving and his whole body strained with the effort of keeping still. 

“Renji,” came that low, smooth voice, still with that rough quality that was slowing driving the redhead mad. “I appreciate your fire. I would never want that altered in you. I know you have desired me and I can guess at why you attempted to bury that desire. I do not question your sincerity and I know your heart.”

Byakuya leaned a bit closer, his grip on wrists and hip tightening even more and Renji felt his breath hitch. “I want to show you my heart now. I want you to only feel. Feel as I venerate your body, possess you completely. Renji, I want to make you mine. Do you understand?”

Renji clasped his hands together and relaxed as much as he was able against the bed, brown eyes still burning, still locked with liquid silver. “I understand,” he responded. And he did. This was his captain’s way of reassuring him that he had understood Renji’s wants, his needs and by some miracle returned those desires. Renji had no doubts that Byakuya knew Renji loved him, hopelessly and unequivocally. Byakuya also understood that words would never be enough to convince Renji that those feelings were returned. He would need to be shown. 

All at once that familiar feeling seized his heart, that weight upon his chest returning as he thought of his desperate love for this man above him, his heart unconvinced that this could possibly be real. His resolve shaken, he rasped out, “Please, Byakuya… I need-”

His mouth was captured again, the hands leaving his wrists and hip but Renji kept himself in place, following his captain’s unspoken request. Those hands instead cradled his head as he was kissed and that feeling in his heart unclenched at what was being communicated through this kiss. There was desperation there, longing, respect, comradery… love. 

He could identify it now. Somehow, someway, this beautiful man loved him. Elation burst through his chest and he melted against the bed. There would be time to challenge his captain’s passion with his own later. Renji was far too emotionally drained to return that fire that Byakuya said he appreciated. But Byakuya had known, hadn’t he? He had said as much. Tonight, Byakuya only wanted him to feel. And so he would.

Byakuya felt the surrender of the man beneath him and broke the kiss with a smile. His molten silver eyes swept across the handsome face below him, flushed with red. There was still desire there, a fierce want, but there was also acceptance now. That is what Byakuya had needed, what he had waited for. He needed Renji to be able to accept that he could be loved, not for the person he showed others, but for the person he was.

With that acceptance the last barrier between them fell away and Byakuya began to make good on his word. His long fingers tailed down the body beneath him, finding the tie that held the yukata closed and releasing it. Gentle hands guided Renji out of the garment, hands unclasping only to remove the sleeves and then returning to their position above his head. 

He was now laid out bare beneath his captain, those silver eyes taking in every detail. Renji remained relaxed, he knew he had nothing to be ashamed of. They were both warriors and Renji’s body was a testament to that. There were scars but he had earned each of them proudly. His muscles were hard and well defined, quivering under the touch of those long fingers as they returned to exploring every inch they could find of his body. 

Those fingers traced every black tattoo, a warm mouth following along after, curling around his shoulders and down each arm. The process was agonizingly slow and Renji was already throbbing with need before the second arm. He remained as still as he was able but his breathing by this point was out of his control, as were the groans and whines that left his lips as Byakuya’s fingers and mouth traced along the smooth black lines.

By the time Byakuya had reached his chest Renji was blissed out to the point that he had no conscious awareness of the sounds he was making. Every touch was like fire, searing directly into his skin. 

When he reached the marks above his lower ribs he arched suddenly, unable to keep still against the sensation, a loud groan leaving his panting mouth. The mouth suddenly latched onto the spot, sucking the skin in and teeth grazing firmly yet carefully. “Byakuya!” Renji gasped out harshly, arching up into the hard body above him, barely remembering to stop his hands from reaching down to grasp that sinful head. Silver eyes smiled deviously up at him as he attacked the spot, one hand pressing down on the opposite hip to bring Renji back into position.

Byakuya continued this way, paying extra attention to each spot that made Renji forget himself and lose control. Hands and mouth traveling down strong legs, running out of lines to follow. Byakuya then moved off the panting mess that was Renji below him and directed him to turn over, guiding the taller man to kneel and brace himself with his shaking arms. Renji’s length was steadily leaking now and he hadn’t even been touched, the sounds he was making beyond desperate, words occasionally mixing in a mixture of “please” and “Byakuya” dripping incessantly from his mouth.

Byakuya returned to his mission, starting with Renji’s back and moving down to that sculpted ass presented so perfectly, still paying generous attention to every sensitive spot he uncovered. By the third one found Renji’s arms collapsed on him, his head crashing down on the pillow, hands clenching it tightly. He desperately wanted to touch himself, just reach down and relieve at least some of the aching between his legs but he abstained, barely, hands clutching tighter into the pillow to keep them there.

After Byakuya had managed to trace every inch of every black line, his hands gently ran up and down his sides, petting him, giving him a chance to center and calm. As he did so Renji realized there were words coming from that beautiful mouth now, praising him, “Good Renji, you are doing so well for me. Such restraint, such submission, you have no idea how beautiful you look like this. So strong and open. So beautiful…”

Renji was finding his ground again, his mind clearing through the fog, but the need of his body wasn’t relenting. In fact, he felt it even more sharply as his mind focused on the words raining down on him.

“Please Byakuya,” he gasped.

“Yes, Renji. Tell me what you need. Tell me and I’ll accommodate you. You’ve been so good for me.”

“I need…” What did he need again? He needed some relief, he was being driven slightly mad with being kept so high for so long. He also needed more of Byakuya somehow, needed to be possessed by him, owned by him, loved by him. He needed to feel him, so deep that what he felt couldn’t be anything else but him.

“Renji.”

“I need you, Byakuya, I need to feel you, please… I can’t… I can’t take much more...” his voice had cracked by the end of breathless plea, his breathing still labored and his mind still slightly muddied.

“Shhhh, it’s alright, I’m here. I hear you. I’ll take care of you.”

That low voice washed over him and he felt hands upon his ass, kneading both cheeks with long fingers. The mouth returned to his skin at the base of his spine and kissed a trail down, hands pulling the cheeks apart to reveal the entrance between. A tongue came out to trace it, Renji jerking forward at the sensation but those strong hands held him in place as the tongue darted inside, working him loose and coating him in saliva. 

The sensation was definitely strange to him. He had never let another man dominate him in the way his captain was so everything was a bit odd. But his body was responding in waves of heat, loving every swipe of the tongue that was both wetting and loosening his insides. He was so far gone he barely registered when a finger had joined, so well worked that it slid in easily without a touch of pain.

He definitely felt the second finger though, pain breaking through like an electric shock through the waves of pleasure. He could feel both fingers being forced deeper, searching, until -

He screamed. 

His voice was rough and almost unrecognizable to himself but he knew that scream came from him. The pain was completely wiped away, the pleasure that assaulted him now not a wave but a tsunami.

The fingers withdrew partially before slamming in again, finding that same place within him effortlessly and began a steady rhythm, finding that spot everytime. He felt Byakuya lean over him and with a start he realized that the captain had at some point removed his own yukata, the strong bare chest coming into contact with his sweating back, mouth finding his neck and nibbling, teeth catching skin and sucking gently, before that low voice spoke directly into his ear, “I am going to make you come undone, just from this. Just my fingers pressing in on you. I can feel how close you are, I can feel you clench around me. Your body squeezing with every withdrawal, trying to force me to stay, force me even deeper. Like it was made for this, for me.”

The response from Renji was a mess of moans and broken words and he knew Byakuya was right. He could feel the tightening in his center curl and then pull tight, just on the edge, just from those fingers relentlessly pressing down on him.

“Yes, that’s it,” Byakuya’s voice was still in his ear, that voice driving him almost as much as those fingers. And then those fingers rammed in hard. And stayed, fingertips rubbing unrelentingly upon that spot deep within him. “Let go for me, Renji.” And he did. Hard.

Renji’s mind whited out in pleasure, his release stronger than any he could remember in his life. He may have screamed Byakuya’s name but his hearing didn’t seem to be working quite right. 

When he came back to himself he realized that there were three fingers now, working on stretching rather than abusing that spot inside him. He groaned at the sensation, his erection returning as he realized Byakuya had no intentions on stopping here tonight but had brought him to release to ease the rest of the process of preparing him for something much larger than fingers.

The fingers left him after several more minutes of stretching and Renji found himself once again on his back. Those silver eyes had become darker and though Byakuya was still very much in control of himself, Renji could see the clear lust there. Renji’s eyes swept along the form of his captain. His muscles weren’t as defined as Renji’s and his frame was slighter, but Renji knew that was just an illusion made from his particular genetics. Byakuya was clearly just as, if not more, physically strong but the slightly understated size of Byakuya’s physique made the ravenette undeniably beautiful.

He had a hard time properly seeing Byakuya’s heavy length as he ground against Rejin’s renewed one but he could feel it, long and hard against him. He had no idea how that was supposed to fit inside him but the thought left him as long fingers curled around them both, pumping slowly. Renji’s head had snapped back from the shock of the sensation then looked back down, watching avidly as Byakuya slowly forced precum from both slits, smeared it with his hand, then guided it back down, slicking them both. 

Renji was panting again, those keens and moans escaping his lips as he stared, fascinated, at Byakuya’s movements between them. After several minutes of agonizingly slow torchure, Byakuya lifted Renji’s legs, which had wrapped themselves around his waist, to curl in against his chest, ass lifting in the new position. 

Those three fingers returned, slick with precum, and found their way inside. They spread out, stretching and wetting, before probing deeper, searching. Renji arched against the bed when they found that spot again, a loud exclamation of Byakuya’s name leaving his lips and leaving him panting. Dark silver eyes watched his reaction avidly, withdrawing and pushing back in a few more times, taking careful note of the angle.

The fingers left and Renji made a whine at their retreat that quickly turned into a moan as he felt the head of Byakuya’s length against his entrance. Renji was panting, overstimulated, and beyond wanting at this point. And Byakuya wasn’t moving.

“Please, Byakuya, please, need you,” Renji managed, somehow knowing what his captain was waiting for, his brown eyes drowning in silver. Byakuya smiled down at him then moved, breaching his entrance and watching his face carefully. 

Renji had grimaced, Byakuya was larger than those fingers had been, and Byakuya stilled just inside, waiting for him to adjust. Renji quickly relaxed though and it wasn’t like he wasn’t used to pain. Feeling Renji loosen around him, Byakuya sunk in slowly. 

He knew Renji had never allowed another to do this and Byakuya was determined to make sure he would only ever allow Byakuya this pleasure. Only he would see Renji this undone, this open, this vulnerable, his body swallowing him and pulsing around him. Only he would feel this heat. He had said before he would possess Renji and he meant it. Byakuya would never share this beautiful man beneath him. Renji was his now and he would make sure Renji knew that too.

He bottomed out, feeling Renji pulsing around him, clenching him tightly. Renji had never felt so full, so complete. Byakuya remained sheathed, unendly patient as Renji relaxed fully around him. Eventually Renji couldn’t take the stillness, needed movement, and shifted his hips.

Byakuya noticed immediately as he had been waiting for his partner, watching him carefully, and withdrew halfway before pumping back in. The strokes were strong but still slow, still careful, Byakuya keeping tight control over himself as we watched his partner. Renji was moaning softly, wanting to meet the thrusts but his legs were bent in a way that he had no control over this, no way of pulling in Byakuya faster, harder.

But he did have his voice.

“Please, Byakuya, more, I need more.”

Byakuya responded by almost retreating completely then slamming in hard, directly against his prostate. Renji cried out and Byakuya repeated the action, pace only slightly faster than before as Renji unraveled, crying out with what little air he could get into his lungs, cascading pleasure flowing down him.

Renji was leaking again between them, his hands clutching at the bed desperately, legs now slung over hard shoulders as he was folded even more, Byakuya somehow sinking even deeper. 

His thrusts were faster now, but still strong and just as blindingly accurate against that spot inside him.

“Renji,” Byakuya’s voice was all roughness now, his own breath coming harshly and he moved within the man spread openly below him. “I want you to cum again, I want you to let go from just me inside you. I want to feel you clamp down on me from this feeling alone.”

Renji couldn’t really respond, at least not in a way that made sense, but Byakuya didn’t seem to need one. He was slamming into him now, but holding on just barely, withholding and denying himself as he waited for Renji. And then that thread that had tightened inside Renji snapped again as he released between them, coating both of their abs and chests, clamping down on Byakuya inside of him. Byakuya’s release was pulled from him by the feeling of Renji pulsing down around him, Renji’s name leaving his lips as he came undone, his voice loud and strained. 

His redhead was blissed out again below him as Byakuya lowered his legs, massaging them as he did so and removing himself from that tight heat. He shifted to lay beside the taller man, curling into him with legs tangled, head cushioned in the nook of a shoulder, and hand resting on hard pecs, fingers tracing the black lines there lightly as we waited for Renji to return to himself.

Slowly Renji did and Byakuya felt a strong arm wrap around him, curled around his back possessively. Byakuya smiled up at him, their positions opposite from the start of this, and Renji gazed warmly back, trying to memorize that smile. 

Minutes passed, hearts slowed, breathing relaxed. Renji’s hand gently clasped the one resting on his chest, pausing the fingers there in their tracing. He bent his head down to Byakuya and gave him a gentle kiss, smiling into it as he realized this was the first one he had initiated.

He released it, looking into molten silver eyes, usually cold and indifferent, now filled with warmth. “I love you.” Renji whispered. He knew Byakuya had known already but something in him made him say it anyway. Saying it meant he couldn’t take it back, that he fully acknowledged and accepted this feeling between them.

“And I love you, Renji.” Byakuya’s voice was back to that low and calm tone, but there was warmth supporting it and Renji smiled. He buried his face against the soft black hair, breathing in deeply, drifting softly into a deep, sated, exhausted, sleep.

* * *

The following morning found them looking out over Hanging Dog on a hill beside the town, three gravestones behind them, fingers linked together as the sun rose and turned the sky a deep red.

“What about the hollow?” Renji quarried. He was grateful that Byakuya had wanted to come here, to pay his respects, but Renji was also aware they were sent here on a mission.

“The hollow? I destroyed it with Senbonzakura the moment we arrived. It wasn’t very good at hiding its reiatsu. I’m surprised you did not sense it yourself. But then, it seems you had other thoughts on your mind.”

Renji started and turned towards his ever-calm captain and sputtered, “Then why didn’t you say anything? Why did we stay here?”

Byakuya turned away from the sunrise to look deep into brown eyes, his other hand rising softly to cup his cheek as he answered, “Because, Renji, I wanted to see where you came from. I wanted to see this side of you that you seemed so keen to keep from me. This place is a part of you and I wanted you to know that I accept it. When I love someone, I am not able to do so with half measures. I will love you completely. So I want to know all of you Renji, you have no reason to hide anything from me. Without coming here, without being here with you, I did not think you would believe me. Or worse, you would have continued to try to be the person you thought I would want. I want the person you are. All of it. Was I wrong?”

“No, you weren’t… you just… I just…” Renji closed his eyes peacefully and took a slow breath, leaning into the hand that had never left his cheek. “Thank you, Byakuya.”

“Thank you, Renji.” Byakuya kissed him softly then withdrew, waiting for Renji to focus on him again. Brown eyes found silver and Byakuya smiled as he continued, “You are to remain differential and professional to me in public but when we are alone, I want you to be honest. I will not have a partner I cannot trust or cannot trust me.”

Renji returned his smile as he answered, “So, you want us to be partners then?”

“I would like that. Can you do that for me? Can you be honest about your feelings, your thoughts, your actions? I will have all of you Renji, or none. I cannot love another way.”

Renji smiled as he recognized the sincerity in those eyes of melted silver.

“Yes, I trust you Byakuya.”

Because Byakuya had had his love for a long time, it was easy to give his heart.

Because loving someone is not the same as trusting them.

Because he knew Byakuya would know the difference.

* * *

_With a fire-lit fang_

_A star now reached_

_Shining boundless and bright_

_Two souls at peace_


End file.
